BATMAN!

As some of you may know, I have a fascination with superhero’s. Particularly Batman. I’ve been a fan of the caped crusader since I was in pre-school. I used to ride my hot wheels down the street wearing an old robe of my mothers as a cape. I remember looking over my shoulder and watching the cape blow in the wind. I think my obsession started developing when I was in college as I discovered the series Batman: the Animated Series (I actually used to skip classes in order to watch it). Since that time, Batman has appeared in many live action movies and cartoons. The animated versions voiced by Kevin Conroy as Batman are by far the best (my ring tone used to be a sound clip from a Batman cartoon where Conroy says, “I am vengeance, I am the night, I AM BATMAN).

Last Christmas I got a book called The Psychology of Super Hero’s. Which was a pretty good fit for me as that is two of my favorite subjects. Batman’s motivation to right the wrongs of the world is a result of witnessing his parents being murdered as a young child. His drive to perfection, which is a crime free city, fuels his desire to continue to be Batman and engulf his entire being. Each criminal he puts behind bars is his way of alleviating the pain he suffers. The dilemma lies with the fact that he doesn’t feel any better and continues to fight crime hoping relief will be in sight. An argument could me made that Batman suffers from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder although in looking at the diagnostic criteria, it’s not a perfect fit. What is probably a better diagnosis for Batman is antisocial personality disorder. Batman needs three of the seven criteria (from the DSM-IV) in order to be diagnosed with this. The applicable ones are:

1. failure to conform to social norms with respect to lawful behaviors as indicated by repeatedly performing acts that are grounds for arrest.
irritability and aggressiveness, as indicated by repeated physical fights or assaults (although Batman would probably justify the fights as contributing to the safety of Gotham City).
reckless disregard for safety of self
lack of remorse and rationalizing having hurt mistreated or stolen from another (again, he would justify this).

What I find most intriguing about superhero’s, aside from their super powers (because they are so cool) is when we the reader or viewer learn about their faults, their Kryptonite, their personality quirks. The book talks about how environment shapes our behavior and influences who we become. This seems to be very true for Batman. The book makes the statement that if Superman had grown up in the same environment as Batman, Superman would probably take on a much darker persona, similar to Batman. This is interesting as Superman has always been seen by us comic book geeks as the squeaky clean hero who represents America and apple pie. He grew up in Kansas, wears a red and blue costume and his motto is, “Truth, Justice, and the American Way.”

Psychology has asked if we are more influenced by our environment or our genetics. I happen to think it’s probably some place in the middle. We can be genetically predisposed to something but without a certain type of environment, the disorder may not develop. This certainly isn’t the case 100% of the time either as certain kinds of developmental disabilities are evident when someone is born.

What I really like about Batman is his desire for justice. I can’t always agree with his methods however. People with developmental disabilities have been oppressed for many years. There are many videos on you tube that depicts the oppression people with disabilities have faced. Up to 70% of all people with developmental disabilities have been sexually abused. That’s 21 of the 30 people at Oak Street.

Our clients need us to act as Batmen (or Batwomen), someone to ensure they receive justice and fair/equal treatment, to be their voice when they are unable to fully make their needs known. What I’d love to hear as I walk around Oak Street is as staff are working with clients on various things is to hear them say, “I am BATMAN (or BATWOMAN).”

Big and Small

I love all of my kids more then life itself but what I have found, as I’ve gotten older is that my frustration tolerance is not as high as it used to be. For example, my five year old daughter routinely comes downstairs at least 100 times after she is put to bed. My oldest when he was much younger did the same thing but I don’t remember getting as frustrated with him. When I analyze why I get frustrated, there are more variables involved that contribute to my frustration. Having that much more kids and meeting all of their needs can be difficult. I want to spend time with each child one on one every day if just for a few minutes talking about something important to them. Along with this, I find it can be difficult to connect with my wife, especially when we work opposite hours. One of us is just about always home with the kids. Sometimes I complain to myself how it would be great if both of us were at home together for the kids and to support each other. But then I also know that there are many families who don’t have the luxury of at least one parent being home.

I’ve always said the best thing a parent can give their kids is time. Time for the little things, time for the big things. Time to care for the scraped knees, time for the Christmas concerts. I’ve come to the conclusion that every Christmas concert held at a school is basically the same. My mom tells me that some day when my kids have grown, I will miss going to the concerts. She’s probably right because she is so smart.

Direct care staff has the difficult task of balancing all of the work they do and at times their jobs can be frustrating as they have meds to pass, medical needs, programs to run, activities to assist with, cares to complete, manage behavior concerns, and meals and diets to follow. What we ask of direct care staff is to take care of all of the needs of six adults who may have the cognitive levels of children/adolescents. If you think about it, this is a huge responsibility.
I have always been impressed with the level of care LBSA direct care staff provides. It’s more then ‘just’ the custodial care. I see staff taking the time to work with the clients not as if they are clients in a group home but people living in a home. I see staff who respects the hopes and dreams of the clients. I see staff taking the time for clients, time for the little things, time for the big things.

Traditions

I forget how excited kids get these days leading up to Christmas. As I was eating supper with my family the other day, my 5 year old daughter asks me for the 99th consecutive day if she can open Christmas presents early. I look at her face and notice the Kool-Aid mustache (which she is very proud of), her sparkly blue eyes and tell her ‘no’ (I’m such a jerk you know).

Each year at Christmas, my family always, (we never missed a year) traveled to my grandfather’s house at Christmas. Some of my best memories at Christmas weren’t events necessarily (although the year I got a football helmet stands out, maybe because I jumped 6 feet in the air, not usually the response of a 19 year old) but the smaller slightly less significant things. I remember the sound my feet made on his brightly painted red wooden step in the garage (I have this step), the smell of freshly baked bread, the Charlie Brown type tree with the large Christmas lights, my cousins and I picking out our spots on the floor to open our presents, the taste of raw apple pie. After my grandma died, grandpa tried making apple pies. The first few were great but soon after the pies got progressively worse. However, he just kept right on baking and we kept right on eating, never telling him how awful the pies were and of course we told him each pie was better than the last.

Grandpa died on December 18th 1998 and I miss him more this time of year. Mostly I miss the memory and tradition of raw apple pie.

Tradition equals memories. Just as we have traditions with our family, Laura Baker Services has a long history of traditions for its clients I have not seen before (and I’m old). I don’t think there are ANY other companies that go to the extent LBSA does in order to ensure it’s clients have an enjoyable holiday season.

We may all feel a little stressed this time of year, whether it’s money, time, arranging family celebrations. On top of all of this, we have all of this stuff to do at work for our clients. Sometimes we feel like it’s an awful lot of extra work, and many times it is. Each and every day we do our jobs we have an impact on someone’s life. That’s a pretty powerful statement but it’s true. If you are feeling stressed at work this holiday season, remember the memories you are creating for your clients, remember the traditions you are a part of, remember raw apple pie.

supporting the hopes and dreams of our clients

One of Laura Baker Services philosophies is to support the hopes and dreams of our clients. As I often do, I sit and ponder about my own dreams and if I was a client living in a home, what that would look like.

You see, I have recently become interested in performing stand up comedy. Not that I think I’m particularly funny, but I know I have the ability to make people laugh. The behavior analyst in me is constantly watching how people interact with their environment. I would also say this includes the words people use and what makes it funny or not funny. In CPI we learn it’s important to pay attention to how you say things as much as what you say. I think this is very true when it comes to stand up comedy. For myself, the things I find funny is what I would call smart humor. A great example of this is the Chappelle Show on comedy central. I must warn you though, the content of this show is not for the faint of heart. His skits often look at things from a sociological perspective and puts a twist on them. One of the funniest ones I’ve ever seen was how different types of music ‘supposedly’ affects different races. Besides ‘smart’ humor, there’s nothing funnier in certain situations of t.v. or movies where a person burps or passes gas. In the movie Elf with Will Ferrel, he drinks a 2 liter of coke and burps for I swear ten minutes straight. I had to rewind the scene at least six times as my kids look at me thinking “What a dork.”

So how would my staff help support my dream of trying stand up comedy? Collectively, we would research the various places that have amateur nights in the Cities. I would be encouraged to pursue my dream, even if there’s a good chance I will fail. Sometimes when we hear a client’s dreams we want to tell them how it won’t work or how it’s not possible for fear that by them failing, we fail as a staff and as an organization. Honestly, if a client achieves their dream and fails, and we have had a hand in helping them to achieve their dream, we have done our job. It has never been our job to discourage the people we work with for trying something new.

Part of learning this crazy game of life is succeeding and sometimes just keeping our heads above water is worth noting. We also have to be comfortable with the idea that we may sometimes fail. We usually learn more by our failures anyways. Success is measured in so many different ways. For me, success will not be measured on the number of people I make laugh. Success is that I have the courage to step outside of my comfort zone and try something that completely terrifies me. If I fail, if not one person laughs, that’s o.k. because I have just achieved my dream.